Old Rockers Never Die - They Just Play Away News-Press, Fort Myers, Florida, August 7, 1991 by Kevin Lollar, News-Press Staff Writer Let us consider the great themes of rock'n'roll, shall we? OK, you got your love, your peace, your rebellion, your drugs, your surfing and your menopause. Menopause? That's right, menopause. Really, give this a listen in your mind's ear: The driving, primitive drums; the thunderous bass line; the lyrical guitar; the passionate, pleading, Philadelphia-accented voice wailing: I bitch, bitch, bitch, And I don't know why; Then I say I'm sorry, and I start to cry; I'm such a terror in my own home; My body's playing scrabble with my hormones. Say hello to my frustration; My nights are filled with perspiration; I never asked for this alteration Called menopause menopause. The band is One Foot In the Grave based in Sun City Ariz. Maybe you saw them on Entertainment Tonight. Maybe you read about them in The Wall Street Journal. Maybe you can't believe a rock band sings about menopause. Maybe you'd believe it if you knew that drummer Gino Costa and guitarist Danny Walters are 74 years old - that's nine years older than Chuck Berry. Singer JoDina who doesn't use her last name, is 51, a year older than Bob Dylan, keyboard and bass player Gavan Wieser is 48, a year older than Mick Jagger. This band of aged rockers started as a glimmer of an idea three years ago. "I was out punk dancing and I heard the kids singing punk; they were making tons of money; they had Philadelphia accents; I decided, hey, I can do that," JoDina says. "I'm not a singer but I found the type of music my voice fits into. It's new-wave rock 'n' roll; it's punk. I found my niche." But the old Andy Hardy "hey kids, let's put on a show" enthusiasm is a long shot from getting a band together, rehearsing, writing songs and going on stage. JoDina started out by trying to recruit female musicians for a punk band that would whine and rage about problems with their kids, husbands or boyfriends. She found no takers. Then she advertised in a local newspaper for musicians whose careers were on hold. Twelve people answered the ad; 11 were country musicians. No thank you very much, cowboys, she said. The only non-country applicant was New York native Costa, a retired court reporter who'd been playing with jazz and dance bands. "When I was a kid, I liked the big bands," he says. "I used to go see Benny Goodman, and I fell in love with the drums. I always wanted to play, but I was a victim of the Depression, so I had to earn a living. I used to fool around with the drums, but I wasn't serious until I retired when I was 60. "When this gal (JoDina) started the band she wanted to get an older type thing. I was the first one in the band, and I've stuck with it all the way." Costa's favorite drummer is the late Buddy Rich - "a genius on drums," he says - but he also likes Ginger Baker, formerly of Cream, and some other rock drummers whose names he doesn't know. As for the music he's playing now, he says, "I call it trash, to be frank. But, I guess it's a combination of jazz and punk. A lot of musicians came and went before Walters, who played guitar with Lawrence Welk for 20 years, and Wieser became permanent members. Once the band was together, JoDina got serious and went to a voice coach. "She wanted to get rid of my Philadelphia accent," JoDina says. I said, 'Don't change the accent. Just help me so my throat doesn't hurt and I can breathe properly.' After I started lessons, Gavan said to me, 'Now I can harmonize with that monotone, off-key voice of yours.'" The band made its live debut in June at the Arizona All-State Jam In Phoenix, where 14 bands of mid-20-year-old musicians played to an audience of rock fans in their teens and 20s. Kind of a scary first gig. "They saved us until last, Costa says. We went on at about 11:30 at night, and we just tore the house down. They went bananas. I was flabbergasted. The kids loved it. I don't know why. Maybe it's a father-figure thing. They wanted an encore, but we didn't have one. We only had eight or nine songs, and we'd played them all. One Foot's repertoire has grown to about 15 songs, much of it original material. They deal with the typical rock subjects, ranging from nostalgia (I wanna go back to junior high again,/ When zits and blemishes were my only friends/ So I can smell like perfume and bubble gum again) to the generation gap (Clean up your room,/ You're driving me crazy;/ Clean up your room,/ You're so damn lazy;/ Clean up your room,/ The roaches are coming;/ Clean up your room,/ STOP THAT HUMMING!). The songs come from personal experience. "'Clean Up Your Room' is basically a mom screaming at her kid," JoDina says. "I remember when my kids were pigs. "For 'Junior High' I was walking by these kids at a junior high school, and I got a whiff of perfume, strong, strong, disgusting perfume. And then I got a whiff of bubblegum and I said, 'I want to go back to junior high so I can smell like that again.' Then I said, 'Holy --, that's a song.' I wrote part of it and gave it to Gavan, and it became a punk-rock polka. As for the future, One Foot In the Grave is hoping to land a recording contract and a corporate sponsor - somebody like Geritol or Metamucil would be appropriate, Costa says - and a U.S. tour is not out of the question. In the meantime, the band will keep writing music and slashing away in Phoenix area bars. Maybe big rock bucks and notoriety will come their way; maybe not. In any case, for now it's a gas. "I'm on an ego trip," Costa says. "When we play, I get sensations I haven't had in years. It's a new adventure, a whole new thing. It's like I'm never going to die. Looking back, that's the way you feel when you're young." 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